|
| A parent's night before Christmas |
| Categor |
Christmas Jokes |
| Total Hits |
8 |
| Rating |
 |
| Total Comments |
0 |
| The Joke |
| 'Twas the night before Christmas when all through the houseI searched for the tools to hand to my spouse.Instructions were studied and we were inspired,In hopes we could manage "Some Assembly Required."The children were quiet (not asleep) in their beds,While Dad and I faced the evening with dread:A kitchen, two bikes, Barbie's town house to boot!And, thanks to Grandpa, a train with a toot!We opened the boxes, my heart skipped a beat....Let no parts be missing or parts incomplete!Too late for last-minute returns or replacement;If we can't get it right, it goes in the basement!When what to my worrying eyes should appear,But 50 sheets of directions, concise, but not clear,With each part numbered and every slot named,So if we failed, only we could be blamed.More rapid than eagles the parts then fell out,All over the carpet they were scattered about."Now bolt it! Now twist it! Attach it right there!Slide on the seats, and staple the stair!Hammer the shelves, and nail to the stand.""Honey," said hubby, "you just glued my hand."And then in a twinkling, I knew for a factThat all the toy dealers had indeed made a pactTo keep parents busy all Christmas Eve nightWith "assembly required" till morning's first light.We spoke not a word, but kept bent at our work,Till our eyes, they went bleary; our fingers all hurt.The coffee went cold and the night, it wore thinBefore we attached the last rod and last pin.Then laying the tools away in the chest,We fell into bed for a well-deserved rest.But I said to my husband just before I passed out,"This will be the best Christmas, without any doubt.Tomorrow we'll cheer, let the holiday ring,And not have to run to the store for a thing!We did it! We did it! The toys are all setFor the perfect, most perfect, Christmas, I bet!"Then off to dreamland and sweet repose I gratefully went,Though I suppose there's something to say for those self-deluded...I'd forgotten that batteries are never included! |
| Rate this
joke |
|
|
| Send this joke
to your friends |
|
|
| Leave your
comment for this joke |
|
|
| Comments for
this joke |
| |
jokes news
An offbeat lookUSA Weekend - May 16, 2008My parents may not have made funny jokes about it, but they were supportive. With any life-changing decision, that's the most important thing. ... |
Drabbles in a Tooth Fairy's Journal - Sa13+SnitchSeeker.com, CA - May 11, 2008[Pardon my insanity and my not so funny jokes they are mainly there to crack me up, am in a bit of bizarre mood, you tend to be that way when you are all ... |
This guy's no dummyPeoria Journal Star, IL - May 4, 2008The show was opened by "Guitar Hero" Brian Haner, a guitar-playing comedian who had funny jokes about crystal meth fans ("Thanks for making the drive in ... |
Baltic Times |
Forgetting Sarah MarshallBaltic Times, Latvia - Apr 30, 2008It’s just that it takes too long to get there and in the middle there are no jokes, not any funny jokes, no jokes at all. When the film finally does get to ... |
Life is Beautiful for Louth Film ClubMarket Rasen Today, UK - Apr 30, 2008... were won over both by the film’s story, a warm-hearted tribute to men and women facing the most appalling circumstances, and some very funny jokes. ... |
funny-jokes - Google News
|
